The Box

by Jeremy Gloff

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credits

released November 3, 2019

All songs written by Jeremy Gloff

Riotboy Music ASCAP

Jeremy Gloff: Guitar, keyboard, vocals, drum programming

Jeff Brawer: Bass, vocals
Derek Forrester: Bass, guitar, vocals

Florida Dame: Additional vocals on “My Own Freedoms”
Nicolaas J. Kraster - Guitar solo on “Before The Ashes”

Additional keyboards on “Atlanta”, “Fort Loneseome” and “Low 
Voltage” by AW


Additional backup vocals:

Shae Krispinsky, Marc Ganancias, Nickole Hanna Lahr

Photo photo by Harold Hasselback
Cover layout by Sidney Chase
Mastering by K. Paul Boyev

license

all rights reserved

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about

Jeremy Gloff Tampa, Florida

Jeremy Gloff is an independent musician and writer residing in Tampa, Florida. Since his first album in 1993 Gloff has released 22 solo albums.

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Track Name: Me Myself And I
When I 
Was twenty something

My heart was wide open
Really thought that I found the one

But I wasted my time he was not the one

Broken hearted and feeling numb
Me myself and I


When I 
Was thirty something

My body was wide open

I gave my body to everyone

I really thought it was having fun

Rambling around and feeling numb

Me myself and I



Remember when all we had was time

The world was open

This exhausting silence

This mental violence

Won’t die


When I 
Was eighty something

My heart was wide open

Be my best friend
Be my own friend
Track Name: The Box
Take off all your clothes
Look into the mirror
Strip away your skin
Your shell it disappears
Your soul it might be diamonds
Your heart it might be gold

No one knows what’s in there

Cause you’ll never show
What is in there

What’s inside


The box

I know that there’s a treasure hiding
Inside the box



Find yourself in bed

With beautiful people
They will only visit

They will never live here

Sometimes I wish I was more shiny

I bruise behind my face
Tell me what you’re hiding
In your display case

What is in there

What’s inside


The box

Your wrapping paper’s hiding what’s
Inside the box

I know there’s someone in there



Open up the door and let me in

Open up your heart and let me in

Open up the door let yourself in

I know there’s someone in there
Track Name: But I Am Not Pretty
I wanna ask you out but I am not pretty
Everybody knows that your friends are pretty
I wanna ask you out but I am not pretty
Everybody knows that your friends are pretty

Flashback to a fashion show
Surrounded by everyone I know
In a corner in a button up
All the things I hate about myself
Rising to the top
Rising to the top
The self hate it won’t stop

Flashback to a drink in your hand
I’m dreaming of a wedding band
Against a wall feeling repulsive
All the things I hate about myself
Coming out to play
Coming out to play
The self hate won’t go away

Don’t think I’m pretty - boys don’t boys don’t
Feeling worn down ‘cause you won’t you won’t
Don’t think I’m pretty girls don’t girls don’t
Feeling ate up ‘cause you won’t you won’t
Feeling chewed up and I’m feeling torn down
I feel real ugly do you wanna get down?
Feeling disposable feeling spit out
I feel real ugly do you wanna go out
Track Name: My Own Freedoms
Up in my bedroom
Up on the third floor
Behind a locked door

My face is half frozen
Stress of day to day
When someone loves me
It’ll be okay

While meanwhile in Russia
Zelimkhan are you safe?
While meanwhile in Russia
Zelimkhan are you safe?
Did they hurt you?
I wanna know if they hurt you
My own freedom

My neighbors just got married
Beautiful groom and groom
We’ve come a long way
I thought my family didn’t like me
Turns out they’ve always loved me 
The way I am

But meanwhile in Russia
Zelimkhan are you safe?
While meanwhile in Russia
Zelimkhan are you safe?
Did they hurt you?
I wanna know if they hurt you
My own freedom

All this time to figure out who I am…
Track Name: Old Fredonia Days
Scott I was so young
I was stupid I was crazy
I know that you didn’t love me
You were straight I know I scared you
No idea why I felt so much
Or why I fell so long
You’ve hated me since ’94
Don’t think I love you anymore

Ryan I know I tortured you
Followed you around town
You’ve forgiven me - it’s cool
Still I am embarrassed
I was gay it was the 90s
Didn't understand my feelings
You’re my first love in high school
And I’m glad that we are cool now

If we met today
If we met today we’d be okay
If we met today
We’d laugh and say
Them good old Fredonia days

I was mixed up growing up
Sometimes I was a bitch
Sometimes spoiled sometimes troubled
Hard to get along with
Probably needed help myself
Needed counseling myself
Chasing Kristian chasing Myles
Adult ruled by inner-child now

Dad I tried to reach you
But you wouldn’t respond
You wouldn’t even take my phone call
The week that you were dying
People accusing me of coming around
After all these years
It’s between me and you
And I know that we are cool now
Track Name: Atlanta
Let’s talk about Atlanta
The yellowish lamp shade
The brown couch
The closed door
Sitting staring at the door
Trying to stay calm
Shut my mouth
I can never shut my mouth

Silent but the tick tock tick tock
Watching the clock
Should trust a friend
Never again

In one day your life changed forever
In one day your life changed forever
You’ll never be the same - no no - never
Driving to Atlanta to get myself back 

Little boy black got himself killed
His body in the ground
Deep as the bodies
These things I stuff inside
37 down 285
Remember that doorway
Remember that window
Remember those soft lips
Breaking a mirror

In one day your life changed forever
In one day your life changed forever
You’ll never be the same - no no - never
Driving to Atlanta to get myself back
I’m driving to Atlanta to get myself back 
Track Name: Closer?
Post a picture at your best
Post a picture at your worst
Show the world your neediness and thirst
They’re just pictures and words
Just pictures and words
A thousand characters read not heard
Hashtag #nobodygaveadamn

And I’ll admit these pictures
Don’t make me feel closer
And I’ll admit these pictures
Don’t make me feel closer
Drifting further and further

See your flaws on display
All your need plainly laid
Your life story in every raw detail
And I will like and comment
Like and comment
Say you need help
Sad emoji on it
Nobodygaveadamn.com


And I’ll admit these words they 
Don’t make me feel closer
And I’ll admit these words they
Don’t make me feel closer
Drifting further and further

I wish I were closer
I wish I felt closer
I wish we were closer
Drifting further and further

(Today I woke up and I wasn’t
In my twenties anymore
There is nothing left in the scene
There is nothing left on the screen
There’s even nothing left to scream
So I go back to my apartment
And I shut the door
And I go back to bed…)


I am dying
One comment at a time
Track Name: Thousands Against One
Carly can’t wait for the band to start
Strip is shining
The desert’s quiet and dark
Ten minutes til the bandit preys
He’s in a hotel
Watching the bands play

And I hear run - go ahead and run
First it sounds like fireworks
But someone’s got a gun
And I hear run
Go ahead and run
Can’t win even thousands against one

Juan and Drew a great romance
The night is shining
The crowd begins to dance
Ten minutes ’til the bandit comes
He’s in the parking lot
Tapping to the drums

And I hear run - go ahead and run
First it sounds like fireworks
But someone’s got a gun
Then I hear run
Go ahead and run
Can’t win even thousands against one

Tired of being strong
I just want to feel safe
Take the toys away
Still you’ve got the hate
I said Orlando strong and Vegas strong
I just want to feel safe
How’d you send your kids to school today?

We sat in a park - all us frightened people
In a circle and we’re holding hands
We held each other all us frightened people
God almighty tell me will it stop?
I can’t throw a punch how could I hold a gun?
Tell me tell me tell me will it stop?
I can’t throw a punch how could I hold a gun?
Track Name: Fort Lonesome
Take me on a bathroom floor
I been down here a couple times before
Get a broom - I know I’m trash
Get some medicine I know I’m a rash
You see the problem is
It’s one out of a hundred times
You leave me hanging other ninety nine
Take me in a pitch black room
I keep a secret and I’m leaving soon

Never never never again
Will I ask for it
Never never never again
Will I beg for it

Got what I want
Hope you want it again
Dust off my knees
Pretend that I’m your friend
My self-esteem under years of dust
My self-worth under years of rust
You see the problem is
It’s one out of a hundred times
You leave me hanging other ninety-nine
Meanwhile they’re in love
I’m going crazy out in Fort Lonesome

Never never never again
Will I ask for it
Never never never again
Until tomorrow

Meanwhile you’re in love
I’m going crazy out in fort lonesome
Meanwhile you’re in love
And I’m living in fort lonesome
Track Name: Before The Ashes
A picture of you from ’84
You never smile like that anymore
And the deaths add up
And the deaths add up
Who’s counting? 
I see you before the clouds came through
Before the world eroded you
Can you do one thing
Can you do one thing
Gonna make you sing
Gonna make you sing

Just smile - like in those pictures
Just smile - like the sun up in the sky
Just smile - forget the shadows
Wanna know who you were before the ashes
I wanna know who you were before the ashes

By ’86 the clouds came in
Add and remove a layer of skin
You’re adult you’re a child
You’re adult you’re a child
We’ve all been both our entire lives
I see you before the flood came through
Before the world screwed up you
Can you do one thing
Can you do one thing
Gonna make you sing
Gonna make you sing 

Disappointments add up 
And the years they add up
Disappointments add up
One by one by one
Who’s keeping track anymore?
(Dad and Kathy still together somewhere…
Happy child’s still in there somewhere…
All that light still in there somewhere…)
Track Name: Tampa
Might not be
The best city in the world
It’s the place that I call home
Might not have the best galleries
Win polls in magazines
If you put down Tampa Florida
You’re my enemy

My friends are here
My favorites roads are here
That crazy little magic in the night
Alright

Laid back like Lou
On a Sunday afternoon
And we’re going on adventures
In the back of Vanna White
Me and cousin Donna
Gonna terrorize the town
If you put down Tampa, Florida
I’m gonna throw down

My friends are here
My favorite roads are here
That crazy little s
Something in the night
Alright

Tampa is my home
Track Name: Low Voltage
Driving through Alabama again
The sky is like cotton candy 
So beautiful
I found a letter I wrote you
Twenty one years ago
Forgot we used to play games
On your bedroom floor
You better grow up boy
You better grow up boy

Cause you’re gone
With you died
The way you made me feel
You’re gone
World with a little less electricity
Low voltage
Learning how to live
‘Cause I’m still alive
Low voltage
Learning how to love
I just drive

Down I-10 a forest fallen
And it’s reaching its claws
At me from beside the road
The lights are out a hundred miles
In and outside my soul
Mile after mile nowhere else to go
I’m destroyed I never let it show
I just get out of bed everyday
Go on day after day
Track Name: Dig Right In
Once I thought I knew it all
Then I didn’t know a thing
These days I keep it blank
White noise everything
Once I yearned to travel far
Now I like to be at home
Once I kept many friends
Now I like my time alone
My time alone - time alone

Watching all these legends die
Shrouded in disgrace
Language of my youth
Outdated and erased
Once the world felt so big
I now accept I’m small
Climbing up the tree of life
Til my twig snaps and falls
Snaps and falls - snaps and falls

Keep starting fires y’all
Keep on asking questions
It’s your turn to find your way
Ignore our suggestions
Populate this universe
Even if death will win
Passing on the torch to you
Young one dig right in
Dig right in - dig right in
Dig right in - dig right in
Track Name: Another Side To Love
(originally written and recorded on my first
demo tape in 1993)

Come hold me baby
Put your arms around me
Let it take me over
All I wanna do is be wrapped up in you
Let it take me over

There’s another side to love
There’s another side to our love
No tengo miedo de ser romántico

Something happens when I look at you
Begin to lose control
Something else takes hold
And my soul is sold

Oh no it never felt like this
It’s not just passion or masochists
Not just passion
But a different kind of feeling

There’s another side to love
There’s another side to our love
No tengo miedo de ser romántico

There’s another side to love
Rolling over highway love
You are my one and only let me show you how
You are my one and only let me know you how
Track Name: Somewhere In America
I am driving down the east coast
With my dad’s guitar
Made a stop in West Virginia
Sleeping in my car
He was a funny man - he was a legend
Still there are no tears

Cousin Kristie down in Charlotte
Remembering dirt roads
Got my step dad’s bow and arrow
A clock we used to own
He was a good man - another legend
Still there are no tears

Not sure who I am anymore
Feeling close to nothing
Whittled down to nothing
Driving south as Tori Amos sings
In a car of dead man’s things
On a highway in America
Somewhere in America

Through a tunnel in the mountains
To the Florida line
Getting close to my apartment
O.C.D. all the time
Numb and sex addicted
I’m feeling just fine
Always a flat line

Final stop in Alabama
Standing by the grave
Of the only one I’d die for
I’m leaving with his tapes
He could’ve changed the world
Still he was a legend
I felt him in that chair

Not sure who I am anymore
Feeling close to nothing
Whittled down to nothing
Driving east as Madonna sings
In a car of dead man’s things
On a highway in America
I’m somewhere in America

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